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Posted on 2011.06.02 at 02:29
i found out today that you we're dating someone for a while...didn't know how shitty it would make me feel inside...

can you just not date anyone, straighten up your shit and try to win me back??

yeah sometimes i feel like that.

Posted on 2011.05.03 at 00:24
i'm ready for a positive john mayer song to consume my life right now.

Posted on 2011.04.04 at 14:31
and she keeps living the life that should've been mine...

maybe i'll get lucky and meet an irish boy who sings me coldplay songs and makes me breakfast in the morning...yeah that's what i'm gonna shoot for.

ch ch ch changes

Posted on 2011.03.22 at 01:38
I have some changes that I'm going to make myself...I'm pretty excited about them..

Posted on 2011.03.19 at 13:28
I feel 100 years old today : /


my life was created for you my dear

Posted on 2011.03.18 at 14:37
i wonder if i'll ever want to be in a relationship again?

i definitely want a son one day, maybe i'll just adopt him and it'll be him and i against the world :)

but i loved growing up with a mom and dad...so hopefully i do meet Mr. Right one day and can do that.


...i'm certainly in no rush though...

Posted on 2011.03.14 at 02:07
for a whole year i judged you for your alcoholism

and look at me now...i spend a good portion of my week drinking...

i met a very nice guy who's really funny and really nice, and i have to drink to be around him because i'm too uncomfortable with myself to enjoy the moment.

i want to skip this whole part already...

Posted on 2011.03.11 at 04:21
I hate that I can't have a completely wonderful night with someone whos really great without thoughts of your familiarity tearing me away to discomfort. Hate.

..As if you were my keyboard

Posted on 2011.02.28 at 02:54
I can't seem to get away from you, you get me, and you're so familiar.

I feel like youre my home town and I'm away at college, lost and naive. I wish that you didn't have such a hold on my heart, but when I gave it to you I had thrown away the receipt. I had no intentions of taking it back.

You keep talking about this new house, that's beautiful and perfect and where Jude can run around and play in the yard..but where am I in that plan? I was supposed to be a part of that too wasn't I? You also think and seemed to have always thought that I was crazy for loving you as much as I did..how can I love you so much that I want those little girl dreams of marriage and soccer games or ballet recitals..with you?? But you're not the least bit flattered by that? I couldve chosen to not even bother with getting to know you.. I couldve taken Will back that day he asked me, someone who already loved me, and waited for him these past couple of years. But I took a risk, knowing that if I didn't, I'd always regret it or wonder..what if? Turns out.. The love was beautiful, eventhough at times it could be pretty ugly..it was beautiful. Turns out..you made me laugh everyday..turns out you became my best friend in the whole world... Turns out...my feelings for Will disappeared and I became completely in love with you. I still don't regret it. I'll never regret it. And eventhough I shouldn't say it and my friends would kick me for thinking it..but why wasn't I good enough? Why couldn't you love me that much too?

I've loved love and everything that comes with it no matter how many times it's stepped on my face and held my heart in it's teeth to ever give it up. But maybe I should..give up.

"Oh and by the way, me and Jude miss you."

..and I'm back to square one..


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